You've heard it said that it takes a village to raise a child? Well, here are ...
Seleda's Top Ten SeferteNoch Who Contributed to Your Idget
10. Toothless, crotchety arogeet hanging out in everyone's gwaro, gumming leftover QiTa for hours on end as she screeched orders to the hapless 12 year-old running around to masTat this or that essential food item. (Two-for-One Lesson: Essentials of Dental Care, and Key Elements of Social Security)
9. Resourceful (read nosy) gorebEt armed with hourly updates of who's wishima is sleeping with whom; who failed the Ministiree exam, who got the DV but failed the AIDS test, and who's pregnant (Lesson: Real-time Information Access)
8. Tricky bale-suQ regularly "adjusting" the weights on his scales as he measures out the sugar and coffee so essential to every household's wiQabi (Lesson: Relativity)
7. The jolly gap-toothed kessel-shaCH, covered in soot from head to toe, rubbing her beredo Tirs with a piece of coal, yelling raunchy insults and cackling with glee at any and every shocked passer-by (Lesson: Poetic license)
6. Little gullit girl, reseller-par-excellence of over-ripe fruits and vegetables "borrowed" from either the grocer or, when she's really lucky, from the grocer's supplier's truck (Lesson: Economics of Segmented Markets)
5. QorQoro'yalew guy, able to swivel his hips without moving his upper body as he sashays down the street with a huge load of just stuff on his head (Lesson: Recycling)
4. The Tena-mekonnen charged with the unenviable task of giving injections for every ailment in the book and expected to cure them all (Lessons: The Intersection of Faith-healing and Public Health)
3. The Tella-shaCH around the corner offering "all-natural, preservative-free, homemade brew" while moonlighting as a pro bono marriage and relationship counselor on the side (Lesson: Multi-tasking for the Flexible Workforce Member of the New Millennium)
2. The 'hood setiNa-adari (it says so, too; right there on her Qebele-metaweQiya) who takes great pleasure in performing her daily ablutions right there in front of her one-room "home-office" (Lesson: Marketing)
and the Number One SeferteNa who contributed to your idget is...
1. The raving, ranting and, most importantly, gloriously nekkid loony who takes great pleasure in running around the neighborhood, particularly near the churchy ladies' houses, when a particular body part was "alert" (Lesson: Anatomy)