Apologize Eds Notes in telegram format. Stop. Abandoned in Amazon wilderness by upper management. Stop. Took plane back to Rio to retrieve hairdryer left at resort. Stop. Took tent and food too. Stop. Ordered us to stay and warm up their spot in comforter. Stop. ("Kezich nQnQ!" Stop.)

Dehnna senebetachiu SELEDAwiyan? Stop. (Is that a rattlesnake? Stop.)

Welcome to Neurosis and Tsebel Issue. Stop. Depending on what your definition of neuroses is, is, we know a little about it. Stop. Yes. Stop. Amazing. Stop. Isn't it? Stop. (Pause to see if thing climbing up our leg is a black widow. Stop. Why, yes. Stop. Yes, it is. Stop.)

Many thanks to our contributors. Stop. What can we say? Stop. Even as we sit scared witless in Amazon basin, on bended knees we thank you. Stop. You are troopers. Stop. If we get out alive, we will come to each of your houses and make love to you, a'and-be-a'and. Stop. No. Stop. That is not a threat. Stop. Though can see how it can be misconstrued as such. Stop. We love…wait! Stop. Speaking of love that hurts, friendly scorpion just landed on radio gear. Stop. Scorpion getting verrrryyy friendly with radio knobs. Stop. Creatures in Amazon very lonely things. Stop. Sad. Stop. Ere radioachin'in, be hg amlak!

What's new at SELEDA? Stop.

Who the hell knows? Stop. Who cares? Stop.

Extend deep gratitude to those who joined us at First SELEDA Chat! Stop. Despite slow start, what a great treat that was. Stop. Bigger treat than trying to avoid boa constrictor near our coffee mug. Stop. So besotted by first chat we were, having a second session. Stop. Can't stop at abol chat. Stop. Join us on May 15 at www.seleda.com/chat. Stop. 7:00 p.m. EST sharp. Stop. Shenkorit, Moi, Daedalus, Guest 90, Guest 80, Red, Yeneta, FreeVerse, Sefanit, Bruck, and all who incinerated four-and-a-half hours with us, let's do it again. Stop. Banner article: Gomen.

... Stop! Shoo, ante boa constrictor. Stop! Shoo, b'leNal. Stop.

What else?

SELEDA launches first scam. Stop. No, no. no. Stop. We mean, charitable endeavor. Stop. Wei TaTa. Stop. How can you get your hands on a smashing, one of a kind, first edition, limited edition SELEDA T-shirt? Stop. Click here for details.

Goodness. Stop. Haven't seen vampire bat like one staring at us since program on Nature. Stop. Wonder if it's true vampire bats love taste of human blood? Stop. Will experiment with SELEDA intern. Stop. Where is SELEDA intern? Stop. Oh. Stop. Instructed to go play with wild boars. Stop. SELEDA Intern not doing a good job. Stop. SELEDA Intern hanging from tree branch screaming. Stop. "Yeweledshin inatE…" Stop. "…dreshilN…" Stop. Jeez. Stop. Meanwhile, poor wild boar who seems staved for attention left to play with Intern's tattered clothes. Stop. Very unsocial Intern. Stop. Add, "Does not play well with others" on Intern's performance report. Stop.

Next month is Food and Drink Issue. Wow. Stop. So much to say. Stop. Food and Drink Editor, who has not met a drink he has not liked, has something to say about it here. Stop. Deadline is May 15. Stop. If you send us Tej in cutie brillEs, deadlinestill May 15. Stop. But you will be in our will. Stop. Heh. Stop. Heh. Stop. Laughing softly so as to not awake tarantula by our feet. Stop.

July/August is annual mega issue. Stop. Double the month. Stop. Half the content. Stop. Control freaks finally succumbed and it will be the "No Theme" Issue. Stop. Free fall. Stop. Open mic. Stop. Whatever strikes your fancy. Stop. Deadline June 15. Stop. We anticipate with fervid excitement. Stop. More excitement than thought of having to wrestle with water possum heading our way. Stop.

Oops. Stop. Accidentally sat on what we thought was tree bark by the mosquito water. Stop. Turns out to be crocodile. Stop. Feeling foolish. Stop. Should probably go before annoyed crocodile munches on other leg. Stop.

Write to us. Stop. editors@seleda.com. Stop.

Cher ygTemen. Stop.

Humble Editors. Stop. Ouuuccchhhhhhhhhhhh! Stop.